On the First Day of Marriage

I’m known to be a bit of a klutz round these parts. My husband would say a complete and utter klutz. I honestly don’t know how I do it. I mis-judge door frames on a regular basis and smash my shoulder/arm/hand into the wall. Maybe my face a couple of times (don’t laugh). B says that when he’s getting ready for work in the morning and hears me in the kitchen chopping veggies for our lunchtime salads, he waits with baited breath for me to scream and run into him with bloody fingers. Or no fingers. Yeah, I cut myself on a regular basis too. B maintains that my clumsiness is a direct result of my need to get things done insanely quickly. That the saying “more haste, less speed” appears to be my motto. AKA: in my rushing to get things done quickly I actually take longer because I do things like pull the bathroom door over toes and rip them to shreds and then have to clear up the mess before I can do anything else. My toes are still healing from that atrocity.

Well today, I’ve gone and clonked myself in the face. Again. This time though using the phone at work, which is something new. I span my chair round to answer my phone and as I was still spinning when I picked it up, it smacked me on the nose instead of safely finding its way to my ear. (I can hear you laughing again.) Currently my nose is throbbing. And is bright red. Rudolph, eat your heart out. Every time I smile it hurts even more. In fact it’s started to hurt when I just inhale through my nose. That ain’t good. And to top it all we have a big family meal tonight to celebrate my cousin’s 21^st birthday. I’m hoping my nose doesn’t swell and need a chair of it’s own by the time we get to the pub….